Writing Challenge

The Scamp and the Writing Challenge: Week 7

Posted on by erranteditor

It is currently a crisp 41 degrees in Edinburgh, and probably not much warmer in my flat. I leave for California in two days and I have yet to pack. I have a laundry list of things to do (including laundry), but it took me over an hour and half to get out of bed.

Right now the cold weather is not my friend.

The writing challenge for this week is based around thinking about something that I could be doing right at this moment that will help me get to where I want to be in the future. Given what I have said for the last three years about needing to break up with the United States, this is going to seem really strange, but I believe that the best thing I can do right now for my career and my future is go to California.

I’ve made no secret about the sneak attack of the dark and twisty. I’ve mentioned more than once that I miss the sun, and that I need a break from the cold. The research, my job, and my motivation have been tough. I’m not focused, not interested, and not the easiest to be around right now, so this mini vacation is coming at the perfect time. It will allow me a break from work, a break from the cold, and a chance to maybe get some much needed tan lines (seriously, I am scary white. If the power went out, we’d be fine because I glow in the dark). This three weeks will allow me a chance to recharge and destress a bit.

California has my cat. California also has my wombmate and my nephew who has been kind enough to wait until I am there to make his debut. I’ve missed the entire pregnancy, so at least I might be able to be there for the most important part. I am a little nervous about being back in California though. I am worried that I will feel out of place while I am at my parents’ home, and that no one will want to see me while I am there. All of those are silly thoughts, but they still creep in from time to time. Hopefully some time at the beach and some authentic Mexican food will cure that.

I guess it is time to get my giant suitcase out and get to packing.

The Scamp and the Writing Challenge: Week 6

Posted on by erranteditor

In 30 days I will say goodbye 28 and hello to 29. I’m excited about it. 28 was an amazing year for me, and I am finally headed in the right direction. It took me ten years to become comfortable with who I am, and every year I get closer to 30, is a year I figure my shit out.

Or, at least, that is what I tell myself.

The challenge for this week is to write about something I would like to change about myself. I think that on any given day there is a lot that I would like to change about myself. I’d love it if I wasn’t so tired all the time. I’d love it if I had a little more motivation to sit down and write without super strict deadlines. I’d love it if I wasn’t swimming in debt. That last one isn’t really something that I can change about myself. Plus, that debt got me to Scotland, so as much as I stress about it, it really is a good thing.

I guess the one thing that I would change about myself is my negativity. When I’m tired, when I am stressed, when things don’t go the way I want them to with other people, I go right to the dark and twisty. I automatically think the worst, and those thoughts spiral out of control every now and then. I know that I am a major pain in the ass for my friends, family, and the boyfriend every now and then. I would love it if I could override the part of my brain that automatically makes me see the world as glass half empty. Therapy has done a lot to help with it, but for some reason my brain is resisting the new programming. I hope that it is one of the things that I can change before I turn 30. I think I am going to need a lot more therapy to help with that though.

While I ponder the nature of my negativity and how to fix it, I have 12 days before I head back to the United States for the birth of my nephew and the wedding of one of the besties. I’m excited for those events, and to see my family, but I have no real desire to be back in the United States. A seven month break just does not seem to be long enough. It will be interesting to see how I fare once I am there. Hopefully I don’t take the wind and rain with me. I could really use some sunshine.

The Scamp and the Writing Challenge: Week 5

Posted on by erranteditor

Week 5 was an interesting week. It was busy, and I had a scary doctor’s appointment and a blown fuse to fix (see previous post). While there were parts of the week that sucked, I survived, and am one week closer to going back to California to welcome my nephew into the world, and be a bridesmaid for a very good friend. I’m looking forward to sunshine, warm weather and no tutoring center.

I’m especially looking forward to that last one.

But I digress. Week five is dedicated to the best part of my week. That is an easy one. The best part of my week was spending Sunday evening/night with the manpanion. We watched a really great Indonesian action film

After the movie we laid in bed and talked about books and movies we wanted to read and see, and we watched a lot of trailers on Youtube. Every time I was about to fall asleep, he’d reach for his phone and show me something else. We’d laugh, I’d make fun of him for his excitement, we’d settle in to sleep and he then he would think of something else to show me.

For me, there are a lot of reasons this was my favorite part of the week. I love any time I get to spend with him, but it was also a break from everything. We didn’t talk about my health, or my PhD, or the tutoring center, or my depression. We just hung out together and laughed. My depression and stress often effects my mood, and therefore my relationships, and unfortunately in the last few months, he has gotten a tiny bit of it. We also have very different styles of communication, which sometimes leaves me frustrated, but after a couple of really good chats, we’ve settled back into a happy medium. It was nice to have something in the week not go completely tits up. It also means that I get to start the new week on a positive, which will hopefully carry over to everything I have to get done this week.

If not, I will just pout until he agrees to a cuddle, or takes my not so subtle hint that I would like a puppy for my birthday.

I think I almost have him convinced that that last one is a good idea.

 

The Scamp and the Writing Challenge: Week 4

Posted on by erranteditor

Rain. Three days of rain. Today I made the rookie mistake of forgetting my umbrella, and by the time I got to work, I was a wet soggy mess.

I came to the office for a meeting, but the guy I have the meeting with did not show up to work today….and I still have to go to the tutoring center…the place that is slowly stealing my soul.

So, because the day started out a bit pish, I decided that a look into the next week of the challenge was not a bad idea. This week is dedicated to the last thing that I celebrated.

Last week I celebrated the new beginning for one of my friends from the university. She is off to New Zealand in a week to start a PhD. While I am really sad that she is leaving (for purely selfish reasons), I cannot wait for her to get settled into her life there. She has packed up all of her stuff here and shipped her entire life overseas. I know that she is nervous, but I also know that she will rock it when she is there.

We celebrated the best way we know how: Mexican food. We went to a little place tucked down an alley, and although I was initially skeptical, the food was amazing.

photo: https://www.facebook.com/elcartelmexicana/
photo: https://www.facebook.com/elcartelmexicana/

Along with the good food was an amazing hip hop playlist, and excellent company. I am going to miss dinners with the four of us from the office, and all the laughing and ridiculousness that comes with our nights out, but I think it will be fun to try and recreate these night via Skype. I’m not always a great friend, but I am an excellent pen pal. Luckily technology will keep us from feeling the distance too much.

I cannot wait to hear all about her research, see all of the pictures from a place that I would love to visit, and eventually inviting myself over for a bit of a holiday!

The Scamp and the Writing Challenge:Week 2

Posted on by erranteditor

I’ve got the rainy day blues. I did not go into the university today, and now my writing is slow going. I think my mistake is that I am wearing trackies and my UC Merced sweatshirt rather than jeans and a t-shirt.

I need yoga. I need a nap. I need some inspiration.

The writing challenge for this week is to focus on making a list of what I am grateful for. I laughed because I just spent the last year doing this every week. I feel like I have done nothing but write about what I am grateful for. People are probably sick of it.

Right at this moment I am grateful that life goes on. This time last year I was a mess. I was headed to a disciplinary hearing over the plagiarism charge, and I saw my whole life falling apart. Today, even with the rainy day blues, I woke up next to my manpanion, had a lazy morning doing a crossword puzzle while he studied Scottish laws for work, and even though my writing is slow going, I have research, I’m collecting data, and I am working toward my PhD. In a little more than a month I am headed to California for the birth of my nephew and then on to Texas to watch one of my besties get married.

All in all, I’m really happy with where I have ended up. The dark and twisty is still looming in the background, but it is getting better.  I am still worried about making my loan payment, still negotiating my role in my job, and still trying to balance my need for adventure with my adult responsibilities, but with every day that passes, I think that I am doing a little bit better with each of those things.

Now if someone will send me so motivation to get my writing done, I will be a very very very happy girl.

The Scamp Starts a New Challenge

Posted on by erranteditor

In 2015 I did 52 weeks of gratitude to help ease my depression. I did not always meet the goal of one post a week, but I completed all 52 posts, and I think that there were weeks where the posts really did help me stay out of the dark and twisty.

I have decided that because on my own I am not always motivated to sit down and do some writing I will spend the year completing another challenge. Consider this week one.

This challenge is not necessarily focused on the things that I am grateful for, but it is just some prompts to get me writing in between my fun adventures as an expat….not that there have been that many adventures in the first four days of the new year.

Back to the point.

The first post of the new challenge is to write an introduction. If there is one thing that I am good at, it is talking about myself.

Here goes….

Let’s start with the basics: My name is Kimberly, but people only call me that when I am in trouble. Most people call me Kim. Those in my inner circle call me Bito or Kimbo, and I have recently acquired the nicknames Kimkwat and Bubble. I’m of average height on a good day, and next to my 6’5 manpanion, I am downright tiny. The biggest thing on my body is my mouth, but my eyes come in a close second because my eyesight is complete shite and my glasses are like magnifying glasses. I keep my hair long, and when I spend enough time in the sun, all of my freckles come out to play.

It has taken me ten years (and a lot of therapy), but I have finally come to accept my status as a gypsy soul. I have an unquenchable wanderlust, and while it usually takes the form of packing up my things and moving to a new city every four years, I think I have finally found a place to put some semi permanent roots in Scotland. This is probably the only place I have ever felt at home. Even on my worst days here, I see the lush countryside, get a view of the castle, or go for a walk around the canal by my flat and my little grinch heart grows a little. My favorite possession is my passport, and I cannot understand people who have no desire to travel and see the world.

I have Lupus. It really isn’t something to brag about, it isn’t even something I really like to talk about, but it is a tiny part of who I am. I take about 8 medications during the day to keep me going, but on the whole, I’d say I am making it work. I get into some real tired funks, and lord help me when I am stressed, but on the whole, I’d say Lupus hasn’t kept me from anything. In addition to the Lupus, I have depression. I get deep in the dark and twisty sometimes, and therapy, yoga, and antidepressants have been a lifesaver…literally. I hate it when people tell me that being depressed is a choice, or that I don’t seem like someone who would be depressed. I fully recognize that I have a pretty charmed life, and that there is a lot of good surrounding me, and trust me, if I didn’t have to feel this way, I wouldn’t it. Unfortunately it has an effect on my relationships, my work, and sometimes my ability to get out of bed. I’m working really hard to keep it at bay, and I am lucky that I have a support system that helps me when it gets bad.

I worry about everything. Overthinking is my national passtime, and I if stressing was exercise I’d be the thinnest person I know.

I enjoy writing. I have an MA in writing, worked as a college professor, and actually like spending time with my blog. If I thought I could make money as a writer, I would be an author and write everything and anything….except poetry. No one needs to read my poetry.

I want a puppy more than most women my age want a husband and kids. I suck at relationships. I get attached quickly, I have unrealistic expectations, and I can’t always communicate my feelings in a form other than sarcasm and sass. A dog doesn’t care about that. Dogs walk off leash here, and I love it when I have the chance to get slobbered on by one. I want one of my own to come home to and take walks with. That is better than a baby or a boyfriend any day (and I know that I am in a relationship thing at present, but I’m not feeling like I’m doing so well in that department, and I think I would be a killer dog trainer). I also want a penguin, kitty, baby goat, and an otter. Basically I want a zoo.

No matter how many times it bites me in the ass, I am a very reactionary person. I’m working on fixing that….it is a slow process.

I’m obsessed with yoga. I want to get my certification so I can be a teacher and teach yoga. It isn’t huge here, but there are people that do it, and I think I could make it a thing.

I’ve got big plans for my life. Everytime I think I have it figured out, something goes haywire and I find a new trail, but this time I think I finally know the direction I need to head in.All  I need now is a British guy to marry me and I could put my plans into motion.