Today would have been my last day of coursework for the EdD program. I can’t help but notice all of the posts from the people that I stayed in touch with, and it still gives me a twinge. I could be one year away from being a doctor instead of three. I think about all of the money, time, effort, and tears that went into that program, and now instead of celebrating making it to the last year, I am looking at the pictures feeling jealous and sad.

Then I remember that the people who run the program suck, the degree program would not get me a job in Scotland, I was miserable for two years, and ended up being expelled over my refusal to apologize for the color of my skin. It makes no sense to me that I would feel sad about it, and feel like I am missing out on something when I see those pictures and posts about moving on to their last year of the program. Don’t get me wrong, I am very excited and proud of the couple of people that I still talk to from the program, and look forward to reading some of their work when they finally complete their dissertations, but I am still not over what happened to me.

On the upside, today I finally got my passport back with my visa, and I have been cleared to go back to Scotland and get on with my life. I’ll be back in a little more than a week, and thanks to three weeks of California sunshine, I will return with a nice tan. I have made some good headway with my own work, and figured out how to get my artwork to my new flat.