Tomorrow I will enter the next decade of my life. I’m currently horribly ill complete with fever, cough, sore throat and snot.
But I’m happy. While I was unable to cross all 30 things off the list, I did manage to do 21 of the 30 adventures, and I am just going to keep going until I can cross them all off (I really want to make a good budget so I can pay off my student loans). Today, on the eve of my 30th, I am able to cross two more off the list.
The first one that is coming off the list is number 29: Stop holding grudges. This one was a really difficult one because I love holding grudges. For the last few years I have been holding some serious grudges. I decided to let them go. I was able to mend some friendships, and I was able to walk away from one and I no longer miss the friendship or hate her for being so selfish and stupid. Letting go of those grudges has allowed me to make room for some new and amazing friendships (I’m looking at you Flamingos) and allowed me to really focus on the friendships and the people around me that keep me out of the dark and twisty. I also feel a lot better about the way I handle most situations because I am not as angry as usual and not as consumed with my grudges and perceived personal slights.
The second thing I get to cross off the list is number 28: Fall in Love. Now, before you get too excited, no, I did not fall in love with a boy. When I added this to the list a year ago, I was hoping that I would fall in love with the boy and move into a different phase of my disastrous relationships. But alas, that was a dud. The person that I fell in love with is way more important though. I fell in love with me. I’ve spent the last year working hard in therapy to sort through all the weird things that go on in my head. I’m learning how to take care of myself, how to find the balance between work and fun, and how to manage my expectations (That is number 30 on the list, but I am nowhere near ready to cross that one off the list, so it is staying unchecked for the moment). There was a moment earlier in the week that I was a little sad about not completing the list before my birthday, but then I realized everything that I was able to do, and how far I came in the last year. Really starting to love myself is a big thing though, and I think it is one of the things that is going to help make my 30s be just as great as I have been picturing them in my mind. Because, as RuPaul says, “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you going to love somebody else?”
Can I get an amen?
Learn how to drive in the UK. Present at an academic conference Start a new tradition Go back to therapy Visit three new countries (Paris, Malta, Hungary)
- Ride in a hot air balloon
Quit the tutoring centre
- Volunteer for a literacy programme
Read a book that has more than 500 pages Make my bed everyday for at least three months Have a solid draft of my thesis completed
- Master scorpion pose
Attend the symphony
- Learn a rap song from start to finish
Host a dinner party
- Create a budget so I can pay down my student loans
Create something original Create a solid workout regime
- Go on a long hike (6 miles or more)
- Learn to dance
Eat an exotic meal Learn to cook a fancy meal Yell at a football match
- Go horseback riding
Master British spelling and punctuation Create a good sleep schedule See my favorite group in concert Fall in love Stop holding grudges
- Let go of my expectations