Research Phase | The Scamp Abroad

A Scamp and Summer School

Posted on June 8, 2013 by erranteditor

Today was the first day of my Ed.D program….I know, who wants to start school on a Saturday? I dragged my tired butt to CSUF at 8:30 this morning and got to spend the day learning how to write. I learned what a topic sentence was, how to properly use examples and evidence in my work, and what it means to write a “scholarly” piece of work. I got a lecture on how to pick the appropriate loan, and why it is important to use APA citations in my work to demonstrate my brilliance. I will now be reevaluating my teaching style and classroom activities…..since many of my lectures and activities are similar to the ones I did today, and since I wanted to gnaw my own leg off during some of the lectures, I am sure my kids want to do the same when I am in the front of the room.

As long as the day was though, it was nice to have this as a trial run for getting back into the swing of being in the classroom. While it has only been a few months since I was in the classroom, the last couple of weeks have really pulled my focus from my research and from the academic mindset. I also got some very useful tips on writing a literature review, and since that is what I am about to start making an outline for, I feel that I will be better equipped for writing that section. I have a homework assignment to do that will force me to write in a scholarly manner, and I am hoping that that little bit of writing will help me get back into the swing of my dissertation. The children’s literature has been sorely neglected for the last few days.

There is another reason that I am looking forward to getting back in the swing of school though. Lately with all of the late nights, and constant socializing with family and friends I have found myself slipping back into my old negative ways. I’m stressed, and with that has come a hostile attitude that is causing me to flip a shit in public. In the last two weeks I have been in two altercations, one of which I shoved a woman into a chair at a baseball game because she was being bitchy and wouldn’t get out of my way. I haven’t gotten arrested yet, but I do feel like I should not be allowed in public (or at least around drunk people) for a little while if I want that record to stay untarnished. I have been home long enough now that I can no longer use the “I just got back to the US” excuse to justify why I haven’t gotten anything done, or why I would rather sleep in the sun instead of sit at my desk and read articles.

Seeing as I sat in a classroom and had a lot of info thrown at me today, I think I will start the “good student” routine tomorrow.

A Scamp and A Mini Vacation

Posted on June 4, 2013 by erranteditor

I need a vacation to recuperate from my vacation. The beautiful thing about California is that it is ridiculously easy to drive through, so visiting two of my best friends in Northern California was the perfect little mini vacay for my second week back in the US. It was the first time that I had driven my car for more than a quick trip around the city. I forgot how much I loved to drive. I was able to drive up the coast, so I had wonderful beach views, no traffic, and some great cruising tunes for maximum enjoyment of the 3 and 1/2 hour drive. I hadn’t seen my friends since Christmas, and we all survived some pretty horrendous break-ups, did big things with our careers, and generally tried to survive without each other while we were spread out over the globe. Although 5 days of partying and late nights has left me really tired, the trip was totally worth it and just what I needed. I don’t think I realized how much I missed these two until I got to spend a lot of time with them.

We got plenty of time to watch the sunset by the ocean, lay by the beach and tan (and I needed that tan) and generally enjoy each other’s company. I didn’t get to see a lot of sunsets in Scotland, and I really missed them. I also got to enjoy E’s friends. Everyone I met this weekend was funny, friendly, and just a plain old good time.

Can you tell that I am fanatical about keeping my tattoos covered in sunscreen? I got a little burned, but it was totally worth it. I was totally relaxed on the beach and didn’t mind all of the sand in places that it shouldn’t be.

This shirt pretty much sums up my life right now. This weekend was very good for my ego. I enjoyed flirting with boys, and even met one that is way worth a second look. I’m still waiting for a word on teaching gigs, and I start school again in a week, but for the moment, I am still rocking it.

Part of the weekend was enjoying a little wine tasting action. I didn’t really partake in that, but I loved the views and it was a beautiful day to be outside.

Basically these two are my favorites. We have crazy adventures, get into a little trouble, and support and love each other in the best way possible. I am trying to convince them to travel the world with me when I am done with my degree, and I figure I have three years to talk them into it. For now though, I will settle for weekend trips and Skype dates.

A Scamp and the Brain Tumor

Posted on May 29, 2013 by erranteditor

Five years ago my mom was diagnosed with an acoustic neuroma, a pesky little tumor that really messes up balance and tries to eat its way into your brain.

diagram courtesy of the Mafield Clinic

We called the tumor Wally. He was removed, and all was mostly right in my mom’s world again. She lost the hearing in her right ear, and had to deal with a little facial paralysis for awhile, but now if you looked at her you would never know she had surgery. A couple of years ago (I think) a new tumor started to grow. This one, Wally Jr. is smaller and lot more slow growing, so for the meantime, he is going to get to keep his room in my mom’s auditory canal.

Last year my mom started participating in the National Brain Tumor Society’s annual 5K walk at Angle’s Stadium to raise money for brain tumor research.

The Parental Units at the 2012 Brain Tumor Walk

Last year she found out about the walk a mere 3 weeks before it took place. Her team consisted of just her and my dad. They raised $350. This year she has more notice. She already has a team of 4, and hopes to raise at least $1,000. This is where my lovely readers come in. As a loyal team member, I am committed to helping her raise the money. My goal is to raise at least $100 for her. I am hoping that some of my loyal readers (although most of them are family and will have heard about this already) will help by making a small donation to the team. For anyone who is in the Orange County area and like to walk through the baseball stadium, you can even be part of her team! She is having shirts made, and there is a Hooters near the stadium that serves fantastic wings (or so I’ve been told). It promises to be a fun day for a good cause.

To donate to her team all you need to do is:

log onto:
www.braintumor.org
click on “events” on the top bar
scroll down to Orange County
click on “donate to a participant”
Type in “Michelle Davis” or team “Michelle’s Angels

I thank you for any help you may be able to give her, even if it is just spreading the word to your friends and family to see if they could help. I wouldn’t wish a brain tumor on anyone (okay, there is someone, but that’s besides the point), and any help that can be done to fund research in the field could go a long ways in making life easier for those dealing with these pesky little buggers. I’d like my mom to be able to keep her brain for a little while longer.

A Scamp and Family Time

Posted on May 27, 2013 by erranteditor

Nothing says, “good quality time” like telling your family about your first gang bang….well, the first gang bang that you got to hear going on in the room below you.

Today could have been a crappy day. Today was supposed to be my original coming home date, and today would have been my anniversary with David. Instead I got to spend the day laying by the pool with my mom and then having a BBQ with my aunt, uncle and cousins. My cousin just completed her first year of college, and now she is back to spend the summer giving her parents grey hair while she demonstrates all of the colorful things that she learned in college (and by that I mean all of the colorful language, the other stuff doesn’t need to be shared). It was nice to be with my sister and brother-in-law and cousins, have some grilled chicken and potato salad, and laugh at all of the ridiculous things that my family says.

I also got to see most of my Scotland friends today. Thanks to technology, I was able to say hello and see them all gussied up for a tea party, and they were able to see sunshine. I’d like to think I was doing them just as much a favor as they were doing me.

Best part of today? Watching these two romp and play in the grass.

Tomorrow I will have to get back to the research. I’ve found some books that will be helpful, so now all I have to do is track them down in ebook form and the research and reading can continue.

The Scamp Negotiates Critical Literacy

Posted on May 25, 2013 by erranteditor

I feel like I am now an expert on critical literacy. I’ve read countless books and articles in the last month on the subject, and have pages and pages of notes in my handy dandy notebook that will help me in my paper. The problem is, I am not 100% sure that I am looking at the right sources. I have a lot of the big name theorists in the field, but a lot of their work was written more than 3 years ago. I also have the added challenge of trying to find the people that write about critical literacy as it relates to tiny humans rather than the mid sized and full sized humans that feature predominately in the research. I’ve found one book that I can access completely online (thank-you Google Books!) and I am hoping that the author of that book will be able to point me in the right direction of some other work to check out.

I’m hoping that in the next few days I can find what I need since the next deadline with my supervisor is a write-up of the research already done in the field. I don’t want to turn in a vague paper on the research that had been done in the 70s, 80s, and even early 90s. While this isn’t my first time writing a major research paper or negotiating research databases, I always worry that I am missing something or someone. The added bonus here is that the university prefers the use of British theorists, while I am much more well versed in the American ones. Because of this, I feel like I am spending a lot of extra time researching the British theorists and their work before I even start reading the book or article to make sure that I am using something substantial. While I know the second reader on my paper will not think twice about the use of Americans in my paper, I am not sure how my first reader, or the external examiner will feel. All of these little caveats to consider have really made the research part of this project a lot more stressful than my last thesis. I would talk to my supervisor about it, but she seems to be ignoring the two emails I’ve sent her. I’m just glad that one of my besties in Scotland is in on the meetings and can fill me in on anything that I may be missing.

In the meantime, I will continue to scour the interwebs for anything that I think may help me in my pursuit of convincing the world that critical literacy is an important part of book selection for primary school children, and hope that people who are actual experts in the field may be able to point me in the right direction.

As an aside, today is the two year anniversary of my first thesis being published for all the world to see. I’m not as proud of that work as I would like to be, but sometimes I still search my name in the library catalog so that I can pretend that I am a badass.

A Scamp Distracted

Posted on May 23, 2013 by erranteditor

This is pretty much the last few days here.

A Scamp Gets Welcomed Home

Posted on May 20, 2013 by erranteditor

Nothing says “I love you” like a sign that says WELCOME HOME SHITHEAD in Scots Gaelic. The sign is currently holding a place of honor in my bedroom. It speaks to my family as a whole, but more importantly it was made by my mom and my sister, both of whom came to get me at the airport. It was a really long day of travel. Really long. I have never been more happy to get off a plane. Never so happy to see my family.

I had a horrible headache when I landed, but that didn’t really dampen my excitement for being home. I slept in my own bed with real pillows, ate warm food that was properly cooked, and am back in texting range with the people here. It was very surreal. Even after being here for almost two days, I still haven’t processed the fact that I am not going back to Scotland. It doesn’t feel real yet that I am now living here again. I feel bad because I blew off everything yesterday, including a chance to see my OMGBFF. I got a new American phone, got some unpacking done, and drove my car around a little. The sun was out, I was wearing a dress, and the small breeze moved the air around just enough to make the day extremely pleasant. Despite all of that, all I really wanted to do was curl up in my bed and hide from the world. Even now, I am putting off reading and work in favor of sitting by the pool in the sun and surfing the internet.

I keep thinking about my friends in Scotland. I wonder what they are doing, I miss eating breakfast and dinner with them, having random movie nights or dinner parties with them, and I feel much the same way that I did when I first left here in September, I am now out of sight and out of mind. Their worlds will continue on like I was never there. While it feels good to be home, I feel really out of place. On the one hand, I am very comfortable here, everything feels familiar and inviting, but on the other, I feel like I don’t belong here yet. It still feels a bit like a vacation. I’m hoping that feeling goes away so that I can settle into a work schedule and start to get things back on track.

For right now though, a nap in the sun is just what I need.

A Scamp Says “See You Later”

Posted on May 17, 2013 by erranteditor

I’m going back back to Cali Cali.

The time has come. My bags are packed.

I’m not ready to go. In fact, I don’t want to go. If it wasn’t for my family and a few of my favorite people, then I would not go back to California. If I had known how much I would love it here, I would have applied to do my PhD. here and stayed for another three years. If I had known how things would turn out with the liar and cheater, I would not have wasted my time here thinking about when I get back to him. This is my home. Scotland has my heart.

My last day here was one of the rare sunny days. The weather was nice, and I was able to take a walk and see a few of my favorite places one last time. I had a horrible meal in the dinning hall, but I got to share it with the people I enjoy, so it wasn’t so bad. I’ve had people wander my direction all night to say goodbye and wish me well. I feel loved, I feel sad, and I feel hopeful for the lasting friendships I have made here. This will be more than the high school adage of “keep in touch” when we knew we never would. I’m already planning to save to visit all of the places my friends will now inhabit.

These 8 months have changed me for the better. I started my journey running away from my problems at home and with the idea of a future and how the next 70 years of my life were going to be, and I am going back ready to face anything and everything that comes my way. My future changed; my plans changed; I changed. I learned how to stand on my own, how to find value in myself, and how to really use my skills to help others. I’m going home a lot smarter than I was before, both academically and emotionally. I learned how to survive in a new culture, how to make lasting friendships and connections, and how to change my whole mode of thinking. While the snark and sarcasm is still there, a lot of the negativity is not. Instead of going home depressed, I am going home ready to tackle the PhD, ready to find a job, and ready to write one hell of a dissertation on the importance of critical literary analysis of children’s books. I feel different. I feel smarter, more mature, calmer. The adjustment period will be a bit rough, and I know that I will have to get used to my new surroundings, but I know that it will be good for me to be back among my family while I complete the last leg of my educational journey.

The thing is though, I hate goodbyes. Hate them. I have been dreading this day for weeks. Part of it is because I am not ready to say goodbye to my home and my friends here, and part of it is that goodbye feels so final. I know this is not the end of my love affair with Scotland.

So instead of saying goodbye, for now I will just say, “see you later”.

A Scamp and the Blind Poet

Posted on May 17, 2013 by erranteditor

Seems legit

My favorite pub in San Diego is called Blind Lady, so it makes perfect sense to me that my favorite pub in Scotland would be called the Blind Poet. The pub is near main campus, and besides being a literary themed pub, it has one of the best Thursday night karaoke madness in the city. We have gotten in the habit the last few weeks of meeting there on Thursday nights to hang out, have a few drinks and enjoy the regulars who grace the stage and sing everything from Evanescence to heavy metal. Some of the people are really good, some are really bad, and some are just really entertaining. I spent my birthday there, met the lads there for drinks after David turned out to be a liar, and both the Texan and I thought it would be a fitting place for a sendoff. I have to say it was one of my favorite traditions in Scotland. I loved any time I got to spend with my friends, but making fun of singers, singing along with the songs we knew, and just being able to hang out in one place all together was a lot of fun. Thursday nights will never be the same.

Here are a few of the photos from my sendoff:

They sang “I Wish They All Could Be California Girls” just for me

A Scamp Meets the Family

Posted on May 14, 2013 by erranteditor

La Habra, California has been described as a place with a liquor store on every corner and more pitbulls than people. That is very different than the picture of La Habra I have, and the way I feel about it when I bring people home to visit. If that is the way I feel about the city I grew up in, I would say that is an accurate view of how my BFF feels about his home, Dundee, Scotland. Dundee would never be called a thriving metropolis, and is known for being a low socio-economic threshold, but it lies within the eastern central Lowlands on the north bank of the Firth of Tay, which feeds into the North Sea. The bus ride into Dundee is quite beautiful, and the bus ride out as the sun was getting ready to set makes the place look peaceful and calm. Even without all of that, I knew that I would enjoy Dundee for the simple fact that it is the birthplace of my BFF and he invited me home to meet his family.

With the exception of David’s family, families love me, and more often than not, I love them. I am also really competitive, so the fact that I am the first (and so far, only) person that has been invited meant that the day promised to be a good one. I was not disappointed. The only downside to the trip was that the day seemed to progress at warped speed and was over before I could properly blink. The trip started off with a quick bus ride. The BFF and I are never short on good banter, so the trip passed quickly. We then met a good friend of his for lunch in a fun little pub. We swapped stories, had some good grub, and then they treated me to a quick tour of the university where they did their undergrad. We followed lunch with a trip to Gran’s house. A good cup of tea and nice conversation followed. I also got to meet the aunt and uncle and very excited boxer. Listening to them all interact and chat with each other was fun. The BFF was very much relaxed, and very happy to be in his gran’s kitchen. From there we moved on to his mother’s house to meet the rest of the family. His mother was very nice and very welcoming. She tried to feed us, and then did the best thing ever and brought me a some great baby pictures. I even got to see him with a tan!!!! This is a big thing for those who don’t know my BFF. He is a proper Scottish boy, pasty skin and all. He hates the sun, and his idea of perfect weather is a cold light rain and possibly some wind. His mom sent us off with a backpack full of food, reminding me a lot of my mom whenever I would visit for the weekend when I was living in California.

The best part of the day was the fact that I had a few hours with the BFF that were just the two of us. We had some serious bonding in the backseat of the car in Belfast, but since then, we haven’t really had a lot of BFF bonding time. He didn’t really know the specifics about heartstompapoolza, but he made sure to show up when I needed a night out and offer me chats and his hatred for David. He is generally antisocial, but he always makes time for me, and checks in with a funny thought or insightful comment. He is one of the things that will most about Scotland.

I got to end the night with some of the other reasons that I will miss Scotland. I got a home cooked Chinese meal and some much needed junk food. I love hanging out with the girls from my program because they understand the need to be random and ridiculous, and they are also quick to remind me that I am not a spinster in the making. They listen to my moans and complaints and fears about going home, and are quick to remind me all of the good that is coming from it.

Even though I am stretched way too thin this week, I am glad that they are willing to carve out time to spend with me before I return to the land of sunshine and movie stars.